Monday, March 30, 2015

Slice of Life Day 30- Frappy Hour Power and My Kitchen— A Match not Meant to Be

Tonight I came home feeling extra energetic, maybe it was "the "Frappy Hour" at Starbucks,  I can't be sure, but I was eager to dig into something.  Since it was 6 o'clock I decided cooking was a great choice.  Now, you should know I am a self-proclaimed TERRIBLE cook, for reasons that will soon become obvious.

I bounded in the door and found my husband in the midst of tonights meal preparations.  This should have been a sign, but no I had "Frappy Hour" power.

I can cook  I will cook.

I mean I have a master degree, I can teach 1st graders to infer, write with craft and share their learning with the world, certainly cooking is no match to skills such as these.

I can cook I will cook!

First, I'll make a cake.  Nothing crazy, its a box mix, its more like assembling food- not cooking.  Cake in the oven- I am feeling like Betty Crocker! Next, I decide to make lasagna.  If I throw this together tonight tomorrow will be a breeze and my poor  hubby (Thank goodness he's a great cook) could have a night off. Yep, I will make lasagna!

I can cook I will cook!

I mean the cake was a breeze, how much trouble can the lasagna be?  It's merely an assembling of basic ingredients at best.

Ok, lasagna…boil noodles, guess what?  ALL the noodles broke, even the 3 extra "just in case" noodles.
Cook and season sausage- success.

OK, noodles are done, lay out the noodle pieces to dry.
I've still got  this, I have "Frappy Hour" power!

I can cook I will cook!

OK, now where's that lasagna pan?  Oh, the clear glass one?  The one the cake is baking in? Yep, that's the one.  Oh, well what other pans do I have, this round one will be fine. OK, layer lasagna, pop it in the oven and remove the cake.

Bless the "Frappy Hour" power!

I can cook I AM COOKING!

Beep, beep, beep, cake is done! Set aside to cool, slide lasagna in, all is well thanks to "Frappy Hour" power!

Beep, beep, beep lasagna is done! Feeling accomplished and ahead of the game I pull the lasagna out of the oven…

The cheese is so over cooked it looks like a perfectly browned pie crust!
Luckily, I could peel this off!

I can cook I will cook!

Now, lets get this cake frosted…turn the cake out onto the cake plate…careful ... loosen the edges…center on the plate and DUMP!

Yep, dump cake is what it was! The sides came out easily, but only the sides came out!

About now it should be obvious why I am a self-proclaimed terrible cook! 

Now don't feel you need to tell me about all the great cooks who make these same mistakes in the kitchen and use these mistakes to create new and delicious recipes. I have a husband who likes to cook and is a great cook.  I am quite comfortable in my status as a terrible cook and it's great comedy to watch me try sometimes.  But my best dish will remain- Reservations!

Thanks for reading, writing this post helped me to hold my self-control in the dawn of kitchen mishaps and the the let down of the "Frappy Hour" power.


  1. I saw the promos for the Frap Happy Hour(s). That could skew anything.

    We all make mistakes in the kitchen. Even though you claim you're a terrible cook,I don't think you'll be making the cast of "Worst Cooks in America."

    1. Thanks for the vote of confidence. I clicked over to your link and I think I saw my kitchen in the first slide of "What Not to Do". The caption read- Deb, don't enter! and I am good with this!

  2. Your post made me laugh! You are my kind of cook! I had to go to a potluck tonight. Everyone pretty much brought homemade stuff, except me. I stopped and picked up a pizza!

    1. Carol,
      Let's do lunch! I will buy, you drive!


  3. Fun to read!

    P.S. I am not a cook!

    1. I really enjoyed reading your slices during the challenge! I look forward to more!

  4. The power of caffeine to convince us to expand our horizons. I've had similar disasters, but thankfully, my husband, like yours, is a great cook.

  5. Oh Deb, I was so hopeful for you! Tip one, never take baked items out of the oven without inserting a toothpick in the center to see if the insides do not stick to the toothpick. Then for the lasagna, no cheese on top - cover with aluminum foil for 3/4 of the baking time, then sprinkle with cheese and continue cooking/baking. Don't give up - you can do this!