Thursday, March 27, 2014

SOL 30 Day Writing Challenge 27/31 Crystal Balls & Hope

 With the help of our oldest daughter and my mother-in-law playing nurse to my husband Livi and I are doing a little in state college visiting.  It's a bit of a bitter sweet mini vacation for the two of us, but not for the reasons you may think.  Sure it's tough watching your youngest child grow up and move on to college, but what we are really grappling with is finding the right fit for her heart and our budget (and maybe the apron strings are a bit in play here).

Livi plans to double major in marketing and fashion merchandising with some involvement in dance.  Well, finding a college that suits these dreams is a challenge at best, but to find a school in state        (remember that budget and those apron strings...) is extremely challenging!  So today we set off to an in state school that offers two of the three.  Livi knew the minute we reached campus that this wasn't the fit for her, sadly and privately I knew it too.

We went on with the visit and I tried to keep our spirits high.  Afterwards we went to a campus pizza place and discussed the visit.  With tears welling up in her eyes Livi again pleaded to go to school in New York.  She's found several schools that meet her dreams in New York.  In her eyes the only thing holding her back is us. 

When I look at the situation from her perspective I am screaming, "Seize the moment, you're young talented and beautiful, follow your dreams."  Then the nagging voice in my head says, "Wait, that's a BIG scary city for a young girl, the education cost is triple the cost of a state school, not to mention the cost of your education v.s your future earning potential." 

Then I look across the table at those big brown eyes filled with tears.... I really wish I had a crystal ball to see how this will work out but for now I am hoping tomorrow's college visit offers more (in state) hope! 

8 comments:

  1. Best wishes for Livi to find the college of her dreams! College searches can be emotionally draining - sending both of you strength.

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  2. We had our first college visit this week, too. It was an instate, private school, and she liked it, but she is also looking at several schools out of state. It is hard to balance my desire for her to pursue her passions with the practicality of the cost. Good luck with your next visit.

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  3. When my daughter (Who is now 30) was ready to go to university, we told her we would pay for tuition ($5000) but she would have to live at home. We had many reasons, not the least was for her not to incur debt. She hated it, but after 4 years graduated in honours in nursing. She told me that there would have been no way she could have done that at the university she wanted to go to. Yes, I was upset I couldn't give her what she wanted but in the end she had little debt and a good degree. It is so hard to know what is right. it has to work for all of you.

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  4. We have done the college visits with my son and been thankful that he has a one track mind and there is a state college with the program he wants. I know when we do this in a few years with my daughter we will be going through similar challenges. I hope you find the right match!

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  5. Sometimes the out-of-state schools have marvelous scholarships that will make up the difference (or nearly so) in cost... speaking from personal experience!

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  6. I agree with Chris - don't rule out scholarships. Sometimes the private schools have policies that if you get accepted that there are ways of funding the tuition through scholarships/work study/etc. And though I know it can be hard, going out of state can be great for a child. I was only 3 hours away but out of state when I went to school and it was a very positive experience. Good luck with your decision.

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  7. Oh my friend, I can see in your words how torn up you are. I wish I had the words to help you through this. I know you'll do what's best for all of you, no matter how hard it is.

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  8. Deb,
    Wasn't easier to parent our kids when they were little. I hope Livi finds the school that will be a good fit. It's a tough journey.

    Cathy

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